My Birthday

Thinking of what my childhood was like is strange. I don't actually feel like I lived it; more that it just kind of happened and now I'm here. There are a few things that come to mind as themes or persistent memories though:

One: like being afraid of the dark, and heights, and being kidnapped, and such.

or Two: being a part of an Asian family when everyone around me was white.

Three: Getting crushes on girls was definitely another. I even stole a few of my Mom's rings one day and proposed to one of my crushes during a lunch break in elementary school. Don't ask me why I did that, I don't know.

and of course Four: my crippling level of shyness, although I didn't seem opposed to interacting with other people.

Growing up for me was a process of overcoming my fears, learning to fit in when I was different, understanding romance, and trusting in myself. The course of most of my early adult life and even to the present at the core feels rooted to these ideas.

Chronology:

• August 21st, 1995 @ 8:30AM
  • born in Montreal, Canada
• 1997
  • moved to Andover, NH
• 2000 (?)
  • moved to Londonderry NH
• 2001
  • began attending South School Elementary
• 2006
  • began attending Londonderry Middle School
• 2009
  • began attending Londonderry High School
• 2013
  • left the east coast to attend college at UCLA

Character Development:

• 2011
  • began thinking and reading more heavily to resolve personal, social, and family issues.

In the last two years of my high school career, I became more social and happier. I was proud of myself for investing time in learning in how to become the person I wanted to be and learning how to interact with people, but on some level I also knew that if I hadn't tried to learn and better myself I would have likely stayed lonely and depressed. I was relieved mainly, and I carried the hope that I had weathered the hardest part of my life already.

A Few Random Flashbacks

My first time drinking:
in my Mom's basement (she didn't know) with 3-5 guy friends. I blacked out playing Twister by myself and woke up having the worst headache of my life.

My first time making out with a girl:
we were both drunk. After making out for a bit...
Her: pressing my face into her rather large breasts.
Me: trying to pull my face back so I could breath.
Her: pressing my face more aggressively into her rather large breasts.
Me: thinking, "it's over."

My first time getting high:
I stared at a juicy-juice box for probably 2-4 hours. My friends checked in on me every 30 minutes or so and would simply nod their nods or remark, "Yeah, he's definitely high."

And lots of other experiences that wouldn't have happened if I didn't try to socialize more.

I left high school feeling ready for college.